I may not like that I have a high percent of fat, but I like that my body processes food efficiently, I receive nutrients, my body is sufficiently fuelled and energized.
I may not like my crooked teeth prone to cavities, but I like that I have teeth and that they function well, I can eat whatever I want and without pain.
I may not like that my hip has a genetic pre-disposition to not sitting properly in it's socket, and becoming quite painful with walking/running when done vigorously or on paved/cement surfaces, but I like that my hips allow me to easily walk, sit, bend, etc.
About 7 years ago, my mom, only in her early 50s, had the same hip problem but so much more severe, and it had come to the point hip replacement surgery was just a matter of time. Parting with most body parts is not a thing to take lightly, but cutting out such a crucial part of your body can just feel wrong. Should feel wrong. It requires great trust in an expert physician, one who will take all steps to prevent or postpone removing the hip as much as possible, and then when they determine no more good can come from staying attached to it, their expertise will take the greatest care in cutting out part of your body, as well as the healing process after. That's how it went with my mom, she tried physio-therapy, medications, exercise, etc., for years she worked at trying to find a way to keep her hip as long as possible, to bring it back to health and live out a few more days without having to carve part of herself off. But the time came when the trusted physician just had to operate, there was no returning her to a healthy state without removing it.
I was about 27 when hip replacement surgery was first discussed as a possibility for mom, and considering my similar hip problems (and due to my weight, the problem was a lot more serious at a younger age) I investigated what I could do now to prevent having to resort to a hip replacement surgery in the future. I needed to be healthier, I needed to eat the right nutrients like Omega-3 which would help naturally lubricate my joints, and I needed to be more active to strengthen the muscles around my hip, and in addition to/correlation with that, I needed to lose weight so I wasn't putting so much strain on my hip. If I did that, starting immediately, and kept it up, I could almost guarantee not having continued hip problems. Now admittedly, I'm a little lazy, I haven't done a lot of preventative body work; my skin care has been more reactive than proactive (haha), and I have a fairly relaxed attitude about a few other health regimens, but if I have a serious health issue, I attack it like a hypochondriac! And now that weight has become a contributor to serious health issues, I became serious about the hard work needed to lower my weight. Now, anyone who has tried to lose weight, especially a pretty significant amount, knows that it is very hard work indeed, but most people would also agree that a hip replacement surgery would be harder. It would seem ridiculous if I just gave up at 27 and said, it's inevitable. Might as well enjoy the life I have now and just get a new hip in a few years, start over with something new. How ludicrous would it be for someone to be so detached from their body, a body of flawless design, not meant to exist without any one part? And not just detached from their body but the overall health a whole body provides, the life you are able to live because of having a whole body. For someone to so willingly give up on it, it's almost unfathomable.
You might have guessed by now that I'm not only talking about hip replacement. You'd be right. The Love Dare book used the analogy that so many people treat marriage like a car they would rather upgrade than repair, instead of a body part we would treat rather than amputate. I very much agree that is the prevailing attitude in quite a few of marriages I've witnessed (Christians or not), and the time put into preventative, or even any, maintenance seems to reduce the younger the couples are. The great physician is rarely consulted in marital health, his expertise is not trusted or even consulted when it comes to the severing. Occasionally, eventually, the mangled mess does get handed over to him to assist in the rehabilitation.
If you can't fix it now, fix it all, fix it painlessly, then just throw it away, cast it aside, kick it to the curb.
When did our impatience escalate so badly? When did we flip the mantra to 'all gain with no pain'? Why is it now considered subjecting ourselves to pain if we stay committed to a hard relationship, which ALL relationships are. Why is our cultural (american) logic so anti-logical, thinking it's easier to replace than repair humans? If that's 'normal' I am glad I am called to be 'not of this world'.
I may be more of a 'when the going gets tough, the tough get going' kind of person, where I can lean towards too committed over not committed enough, but I still struggle with being in pain. I stuggle being in the pain of imperfection, and sometimes I wish I could just put myself in the body shop to have a complete overhaul. I have a lot of impatience, I want to fix it all and as soon as possible. I hope I never lose sight of the whole well being of our marriage for focusing on the repairs. And realize that every marital health issue is serious and I should do as much preventative medicine as I can NOW, to reduce the need for major surgery later. Like losing weight, preventative work on marriage is not easy, it takes dedication and perseverance, but considering the alternative it IS the easy route.
My husband is part of me. I feel what pains him and vice versa. The life that flows through him gives me life. I was not meant to be whole without him.
May I always remember that.
By the way, here is a great place to blog to check out for more motivation to be a Godly wife.
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