Ok. I've determined I need some accountability and what better way to get people involved than to announce it on the internet. I need more than just Sean at home, I need more than just co-workers, I need more than just family, or just friends. I need everyone.
I don't know what's my issue, seriously. It's one of the hardest things I've ever had to work at. It has such a negative impact on my life yet I can't find the will power on my own to get rid of it. I have SO many motivators:
1. It's expensive.
2. It's very likely the main contributor to 3 medical issues I've had lately.
3. It increases my already high risk of other medical issues.
4. It lowers my self-confidence.
5. It lowers my energy and productivity.
I'm talking about my weight. No one ever wants to admit they are over weight, especially not me. There has been enough people in my life who've admitted it for me. It's an issue I've struggled with since puberty, up and down my weight has fluxuated, but any weight I lost wasn't due to effort on my part, it was all circumstance. And as great as I felt when I felt attractive, and other people said, or acted like, I was..... and as horrible as I've felt when I feel unattractive, and other people say, or act like, I am.......it's still isn't able to motivate me. Every day is a reminder, I can't deceive myself, my clothing size speaks volumes, I feel it in the the beginning signs of arthritis in my hips and knees, I am ill-rested due to my snoring and possibly sleep apnea, and I am dreading the news March 11th, that it might be tied to infertility. My head knows I have enough reasons to suck it up and do the hard work, but my spirit is a machine that runs on encouragement, and motivation and encouragement are NOT the same thing.
I've even put some other motivators in place, like money, I pay Sean when I fail at my commitments to lose weight, and I get paid when I exceed my commitments. And money motivates me, believe me, I'm going to HATE giving it to Sean because he's promised to waste it in a way I'll hate, and I will LOVE spending it because, that's what I love to do. But will that encourage me? I don't know.
So I need everyone who cares to encourage me. Encourage me to not have the donuts that get brought into work way too often. Encourage me to go for a walk with you some time. Anyway you can think of, encourage me (lovingly..... I already have tough love motivators : ).
Please, thanks.
2 comments:
We can encourage each other. At my last doctor's appointment, my weight has just past the healthy BMI number and I want to get it back under (another reason for my 100 day pop free challenge)
Thanks it's a deal. I've done pretty good this week. The soreness is also a good reminder I don't want to snack and have the pain all be for not. And how is the pop-free challenge going? It's hard to avoid things when other people in the household still have them, isn't it...or have they joined you in the pop fasting?
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