Self-Portrait Saturday - your image through your eyes

I took this pic shortly before I chopped my hair, on a beautiful sunny day...two things I really miss lately.

Wordless Wednesday - Appreciation

Friday Fill In

1. The last time I lost my temper I was tired, not feeling well, things weren't going my way, and it was probably over in less than 5 minutes.
2. This stomach virus is what I'm fed up with!
3. The next book I'd like to read is a Stephen King book hubby picks, we're making each other read a book by the other's favorite author.
4. Walking outside in the sun with no wetness, is what I'm looking forward to.
5. If you can't get rid of the skeleton[s] in your closet, you haven't tried just being honest!
6. The best thing I got in the mail recently was new Ted Dekkar books, which I can't read until I'm done the Stephen King book : (
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to preparing for renos, tomorrow my plans include renos and Sunday, I want to not do renos!

"Things I want my children to know" Thursday

I've been focusing a lot lately on balancing the need for self-improvement and loving myself the way I am. I really want my children to love themselves the way God made them. It's taken me a long time to stop comparing myself, wishing I had a feature/characteristic someone else had, and I hope to instill a sense of self-appreciation in my children from the start. God has a plan for us, so He has made us to certain specifications so we can carry out that purpose.
However, we are also humans, who mess up, who get hurt and create unhealthy coping devices, who hold onto baggage, and so there will most definately be times in my children's lives where they will need to go on a quest for self-improvement, in order to be healthy physically, emotionally, spiritually, and/or intellectually. But even if that weren't the case, it is okay to aim for better, and want to improve ones self just to be a better person, just as long as they don't start to see themselves as less than because they aspire for better.
I made so many bad choices because I didn't have a lot of self-worth, which caused me to allow myself to slip into very unhealthy mindsets, and so one of my biggest hopes is that I can build a strong foundation of self-worth in my children. It's one thing to know you are loved, but it's also important to know why.

Top Ten Tuesday - Ten Things You’d Fix in Your Home

Well, I thought this was appropriate since we've been slowly pecking away at small renos recently, and most of them should be done this Saturday when the BIL comes over to help. Yay!
Some of this list is of course only if we stayed in this house, and we had the time and money to do so, but it's still nice to dream.

1o. Fix up the mudroom - drywall, linoleum flooring, add a door (all but drywall happening soon :)
9. Replace kitchen backsplash - right now it's the same boring material as our counter tops but only goes up half way, it's warping, and the paint job on the top half is bad, with brown water marks I can't seem to get off
8. Renovate kitchen cupboards - remove some cupboards for dishwasher, pullout drawers need to be fixed, add pantry (new pullout drawers and pantry going in this weekend!)
7. Paint the exterior of the house to match the garage (on the to do list)
6. Replace all doors in the house - some are missing parts of the frame, the door knobs hardly work (we've been trapped in our bedroom before), the paint is cracking and has marks all over it
5. Replace the carpeting, wherever the cats can access, with hardwood or linoleum
4. Renovate the bathroom - needs proper caulking, put in better shelves, and a nicer sink and mirror (we'll manage the caulking at least)
3. Landscaping - level out the yard, remove tree stumps, new stone pathways (house to front sidewalk, and house to garage), and some general prettying up
2. Add a cement pad next to the garage and create a car port
1. Add a master bedroom off the diningroom, with a half bath and walk-in closet - making our house a 3 bedroom, 1 1/2 bath, approx. 1300 sq. ft. home.

If that didn't cost more than just buying a new house, and if it wouldn't make living there during the renos unbearable, I'd do it. Sean still isn't sold on that idea though.

Still on track

So, I’m still trucking. I’ve created a spreadsheet of all the food I eat and how many calories they are per servings, so I can just enter how many items of what I ate and it automatically calculates my total calories for the day. It really helps me stay aware of my portion sizes as well as shows me how making the right choices in food allows me to eat more for my calorie allowance. I learned something from a nutritionist on the Rachel Ray show on Friday, if you splurge one day don’t starve yourself the next day to compensate, because that actually does double the damage. Try to keep your daily calorie amounts consistent, and so I’m watching my daily total for that. I enter it in my spreadsheet before the next meal so I am aware of how on track I am for the day, or off track, because if I treat myself, it severely restricts what I can do for the rest of my meals that day. I also separated the sheet into food groups so I can try to get the right amount of fruits & vegetables, carbs and proteins.
As for exercise, last week was my best week yet. I met my weekly goal after my two sessions at the gym. It used to take me 4 weekly sessions at home to reach that goal. Then I had Friday off, so I went to the gym and after some treadmill and bike time, my weekly goal had been more than doubled. And I still did yoga on Sunday morning too, because I hadn’t had a chance to add it to my routine in the week and I want to do it at least once a week for stretching and flexibility. So, despite feeling ill 2 out of 7 days this week I had a really good week! However, this week marks the beginning of my third month exercising and so I’m increasing my weekly goal by half an hour to 120 min. I’m very sure I will be able to keep reach that goal though, and I still hope to exceed that goal as soon as I start adding some outdoor activities. Tami told me 20-30 min. 3-5 times per week was a good goal, so in a month from now, when I bump my goal up to 150 min., I think that's where I'll cap my goal, for ‘punishment’ and ‘reward’ purposes, but I of course will continue to take every opportunity to exercise more than that.
Last week I finally measured myself to gauge changes in numbers not just how my clothes feel. And I took a photo of myself too, which I plan on doing once a month, which will help me see results easier than what I see in the mirror each day. I didn’t weigh or take measurements of myself this week as it’s my week to retain water and get bloated, so I don’t want to get discouraged with what those results might look like. But it’s a great way to get my mind off the scale….I keep wanting to weigh myself and I have to keep reminding myself weight loss is just a secondary result. Being healthy is number one, and so I will exercise and eat better even with no results. Of course, if I’m not getting any results, I would have to question my methods and re-evaluate my plans.

You are Beautiful! - Musical Monday

So, I found a favorite song that I love to listen to while working out! Now, it may seem a little questionable to some people but I love it. It's called "Big Girl You Are Beautiful" by Mika. Talks about having curves in the right places, and "a real woman needs a real man here's why....now a whole lotta woman needs a whole lot more." When I can tend to be a bit hard on myself for not seeing results it`s a good reminder to love myself as I am, and not take my size so seriously. My size isn`t the end all, be all of who I am. But it`s also a motivator, because relating to a song directed at `big girls` can also give me that extra motivation to lose that label. And it`s a catchy little tune that`s fun to move to, whether it be dancing around the house or at the gym. Here is the video of the song on youtube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szUsGwuuhAk